08 July, 2010

I'm boring. I know.

There's just SO much going on! 


Okay, not really. I'm also lazy on top of boring. 


Anyway. I have a new follower and I thought she had a great question for me and I didn't want it to get lost in the comments. So here it is...


"I notice your from Vegas?! I'm here too and my hubs was also a Marine. Here's background on my question...
Hubs got out of the Corps. almost a year ago. I though I hated it while he was in (back to back deployments, long hours, away from home...). Now we have a babes and I miss it, yes, me. I know if our country wasn't in a bajillion wars this would be his career.

So... how did you get to the point where you were ok with deployments and moving and being alone... a lot? "


I am from Vegas! Born and raised. 

This is a really tough question for me, because I don't necessarily think I'm ok with deployments, moving, and being alone all the time. You never get used to living away from your spouse for years at a time. But I am better able to cope. 

The first deployment The Husband did, I was a wreck. A total and absolute wreck. I hardly left the house, I watched the news 24/7 like a moron, and did nothing for myself. I wasn't working, I was taking one class at a time (which will not get you your degree in a reasonable amount of time, btw), and my entire identity was wrapped up in being a Marine wife. I had lost myself in his career.

Deeper than you were thinking I would go? Probably. A little dramatic, too. I like dramatic effect. Go with it. 

Anyway...

When The Husband was told he was deploying a second time, I vowed to do it differently. He was actually supposed to be EASing next month, so we decided that I would pack up, move home, find a job, finish school, and prepare for another major life change. 

He deployed the second time in March of 2008 and by that time, I had realized that there was much more to me than just the "girl who wore a yellow ribbon" (Love that cadence). 

Now trust me, I have nothing against being moto. I wear my USMC tees with the best of 'em (but you will never see me with a MARPAT purse, I can promise that much). But I think it's so easy to fall into a pattern of tagging along and supporting your spouse that you never really become, or stay, your own person. Fortunately, I'm surrounded by some amazing military wives who show me everyday what it is to be supportive and independent. 

So, all that to say that I learned to cope by doing things for me when I needed to. 

I also remember that there is a light at the end of this tunnel of unknown length. That helps, too. 

3 comments:

  1. I'd like to add to that if you dont mind! (btw have i told you that i am a new-ish follower? maybe maybe not) I like to think that I handled my first "marital" deployment quite well(one previous deployment as a "friend") I attribute that to two things. 1.) Having a great support system. I didn't waste anytime once I became a Marine wife, I made friends all over the place. We talked, we compared stories, we confided in each other during the long lonely months. I'm not sure I would have done so well without them. 2.) Like you said I kept myself busy! I worked like I've never worked before. I took on all kinds of projects. I even let a new Marine's wife live with me for a month who had just came to Hawaii to get settled before her Marine was due back. She kept me pretty busy as well!

    Probably more than you needed... but oh well!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Took you long enough to update :-P
    I just wanted to say hi :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Thanks for answerng my question! I have to say my first deployment I was a wreck. I live in vegas and became a big time drinker clubber. The 2nd deployment was a breeze and much better.

    Love your blog.

    ReplyDelete

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